Breaking News! Squirrel Breaks Into Home, Eats Some Basil.

July 4, 2009 at 2:58 pm (Holy Squirrel Batman!) (, , , )

The break- in occurred early in the day on July 4th, our nations independence day. Apparently squirrels all over America are also celebrating their independence by breaking into homes. The Lalonde household fell prey to a squirrel break-in via their kitchen window. Luckily they were home and no one was harmed.

People had warned the Lalondes time and time again not to feed the squirrels so close to their home, but Mrs. Lalonde’s love of the small creatures was without boundaries, or so she thought. While relaxing on the couch the Lalondes heard a ruckus in the kitchen.

“We thought it was one of our clumsy cats falling into the sink,” stated Mrs. Lalonde, with a sharp hint of glee in her eyes.

What they found instead was a squirrel knocking over a bunch of window plants and chowing down on some potted basil. The criminal squirrel entered the house through a small hole he had chewed in the screen. Upon being discovered the squirrel in question fled the scene through his original entry point.

When questioned about the incident Mr. Lalonde stated, “He was actually sitting on the corner of the sink, I’m going to have to install metal screens now, vinyl screens are no good bul.”

Mrs. Lalonde insists this event will not deter her from feeding her beloved squirrels, though she has since moved the basil outside and intends to plant it in the ground, safely away from the kitchen window.

Maalox the squirrel could not be located for comment on the incident, leading squirrel authorities to believe he may have been the culprit or at least involved in the basil incident. Due to personality traits they are currently leaning towards Steven Andrew Orsborn the squirrel as their primary suspect. Flea the cat is totally pissed that he slept through the incident.

squirrel wanted


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Meet Mr. Maalox, an up close and personal look at my friend the squirrel.

July 1, 2009 at 12:17 pm (Holy Squirrel Batman!) (, , , )

Hmmm. I’m always updating on a rabbit rabbit. Fitting. So months have gone by and nothing. I have definitely been slacking. I need to remedy that right quick. It’s been almost a year since we went on our Nova Scotia Moto trip and I haven’t even finished the blogs. Woe is me. I’ll have to get on that since the last three days include some of the best and worst times of the trip. But for now I just have some pretty rad pictures of my friend Maalox. The grocery store is out of raw peanuts right now (insert outrage here) so I had to splurge and give him almonds and pecans from my baking cupboard. He rewarded me with some up close and personal time this morning so I thought I’d share. I am hoping to befriend two more yard squirrels so that I can name them after my friends Steven Andrew Orsborn and Jared. They both got the result “squirrel” in the cheesy facebook patronus quiz. I was totally jealous. We currently have one non-Maalox visitor, a super skiddish squirrel that hurriedly steals nuts and runs away, he’ll definitely be Steven Andrew.

For now here’s the king of our backyard, Maalox…
grassy squirrel
Maalox and the Pecans
Maalox smile
all up in your face
my my maalox
oh word
contemplation of a pecan

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